One thing that I always try to keep in mind is not to put any expectation on people.
People changed, so did I and many of us.
At one time, it feels unfair that we set some specific expectation to a person and eventually they do not fulfill our desire. We want to control people’s actions towards us, but then we realized we cannot control everything. We only can control our well-being.
Having the ability to control everything as much as we want is a satisfaction. But turns out life may not seem so much fun if we know what happened next.
As an overly sensitive person, I do have a lot of expectations on people until this exact second. We expect him to be kind to us, we expect teachers to be nice to us, we expect our parents to understand us better and the list goes on. Almost all of your thought will be muddled with expectations.
The past days I had some high-and-low expectations toward people around me. For instance, I expected someone to be kind to me. I talked about this stuff with my friend and we had this conclusion : we just had a negative vibe. Well, keeping your mind positive is kind of hard when you interact with that person 24/7. I finally realized that everyone has a chance to change themselves and to be better. Perhaps she’s not kind at me only for this fleeting moment, but two or three years later? Only God knows what will happen.
Expectations have many forms and it is complex. Sometimes, when I feel I do a good deed to another person, I expect him/her to do a good thing to me in return I am sure all normal human beings have once felt that kind of expectation. Turns out, the person earlier did not any good to me instead, he/she did something that really offends/disappoints me. It’s like he/she owes something to me.
Another thing I always try to keep in mind is being sincere for everything you had done.
Do not feel that everyone owes you something, but remember that you owe them something. In my view, it might be him/her who owes me but in his/her view, it might be me who seems ungrateful and impudent.
In Islam, we know the term ‘husnudzon’ which means keeping a positive thought. And it’s really hard, though, I admit, to always have 'husnudzon' attitude at any cost. Some people might say that keeping a positive thought (although we have known the truth that someone did bad to us) is a naive, stupid actions. That is..partly true. But at least, by having husnudzon, we have hope for the people to change in the future.
Last but not least, I believe we must expect to the one and only Mighty God. He is the only one who knows really well what’s in our deepest heart. By trusting God, not always people, we will become more sincere with our actions unconsciously.
Ah...and our time in this world is limited. So why bothers another humans action towards you instead of improving yourself?
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